Some days are harder than others….really hard. I’m now consumed with fear of my kids dying, my husband dying, my mom, my sister. It’s crippling, its debilitating…but I know it wont last forever. I thought this stage of my recovery had been dealt with, clearly not. I realise now that I’ve had anxiety for a long time, most propably from the time I was a teen. But it got worse when I went through my divorce and even worse after my son’s birth.
Postnatal anxiety is really a long journey, not an easy ride. Its days like these when I wish I hadn’t gone through PND, I just want to cry and ask God why me, wwwhhhhyyyyyy me? But I won’t. Instead I’m going to thank him for being here when I needed him most, for blessing me with such a wonderful family and for using me to help others.
“Nobody told me, the road would be easy…and I don’t believe he’s brought me this far to leave me.” Mary Mary